Little Movie, Big Themes

There’s not much good to say about a long holiday weekend where you’re both sort of sick and you don’t really feel good enough go out and do anything , take up a nice invitation from friends, or have people over. That was our Labor Day weekend here at The Aerie.  In fact, the malaise was really only good for getting this space in shape (such as it is) and watching tv.

I really took advantage of the Netflix streaming thru the Wii for watching gone-but-not-forgotten-favorites, namely Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Kolchak: The Night Stalker.  I could have watched them for a long time, but for some reason The Beloved wasn’t quite as enthused about these choices as I was.  Hmmm…

So, we searched our “Suggested For You” list and came upon the independent science-fiction comedy (a very small genre I would think)  “TiMER” with Emma Caulfield (better known as Anya from Buffy) a lonely turning-30 girl that can’t seem to find her dream guy.  The science-fiction element comes in because she lives in a world where you can get “the TiMER” — an implanted clock (that looks like an embedded wristband) that lets you know to the second when you’re going to meet The One, your soul-mate.  I loved the Apple Store look of the place where you went to get your own, and I’m sure the lower case “i” in TiMER was no error.

Poor Anya (her name wasn’t Anya in the movie, but that’s what I kept calling her in my head), however has had a TiMER, but it hasn’t started counting down yet (meaning her One hasn’t yet gotten a TiMER).  She struggles with age-old dilemma of “why haven’t I found my soul-mate?” and its corollary “what if I don’t find my soul-mate?” and perhaps its worse extension “what if I don’t have a soul-mate?”

This isn’t a heavily existential movie though — as it light-heartedly moves through Anya’s and her similarly soul-mate-less sister try and make it in a world where “fate” has one-upped “chance”.  And I think this is why I enjoyed this movie so much.  It takes a simple premise and extrapolates it.  As an adult it makes you consider some relevant questions:

  • Do you believe in the concept of The One?
  • Would you get a TiMER if it was available?
  • Would you go on dates with someone you knew wasn’t going to be your soul-mate?
  • Is dating’s only purpose to be a “soul-mate” tryout?
  • What would you do if you’d gotten your TiMER at say, 18 and saw (like I would have) that you had TWENTY YEARS to go before you met the love of your life? That’s a lot of singlehood?  How would you spend it?  Would that excite you (Yay! I’m going to find my true love!) or depress you (two decades!!?!??! wahhhhh!!)
  • As for me, I suppose I’m a big Free Will guy.  I think that you’d lose a lot the joy and spontaneity of life if everything was prescribed by Fate.  And besides, if you only dated your True Love, you’d never have any good — and by good I mean bad but at least fun in retrospect — dating stories like this, or that, or those.

    What about you guys?  Do you believe in Fate or Chance?  Do you believe in The One or are there Many (or Few)?  Would you get a TiMER?  If you are married, would you and your spouse get TiMERs to “confirm” that you’re Soul Mates?  Or would you be afraid to find the answers?

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    29 thoughts on “Little Movie, Big Themes

    1. I don’t know if I would get a TiMER or not. Steve you are sending me to the library website a lot now a days. I don’t believe in the one concept. I think love is just trying. some people give up and that is how you fall out of love. It does need to be somewhat reciprical though. Both parties have to try or it will fail.

      Library success. I am #4 on the list for one copy.

    2. When I was little and heard people talk about soul mates, I always thought it was a huge improbability to have chance thrown in, in order to find each other. What if that guy that just crossed the street was your soul mate, but you stopped to get a paper or something? I just felt like it was too “iffy”. ;)

      I would never get a timer. If I did, I’d have to get a set, because I feel like some of us have more than one soul mate in life. I don’t mean that in any positive or negative way… I just mean people are wired differently.

      I hope you feel better.

      • Feeling a lot better today, thanks! :)

        I had a long conversation with a friend once who thought that maybe there wasn’t One, but there were Few. That’s not so bad of a concept.

    3. Interesting concepts! I’ve thought some about that whole concept of “The One” and I’ve noted that people often tend to mate (for lack of a better term) with someone who lives more-or-less in the same area as them – or same college, or same places on the web…not necessarily that they grew up or even physically live in the same geographical location. But if you believe that there is only ONE person for you, is it really so convenient that so many of us actually find that person….when statistically speaking that one person could be anywhere on the globe? Or is it fate, or divine intervention, that people from different areas somehow happen to find each other?

      I agree with you that knowing ahead of time what’s going to happen – in any aspect of your life, really – kind of spoils the allure of the unknown, and the thrill of these things when they actually happen. But that’s coming from someone who’s not a planner. ;)

      • Oh yeah, also? Here I was thinking, gee, Steve won’t update his blog over the weekend because no doubt he’s out doing something fun. I’m sorry you weren’t! And I hope you feel better.

        And – I’m totally adding MST3K to my instant Netflix. Awesome.

      • The less savory idea of that probability argument is from The Silence of the Lambs, when Lechter is telling Clarisse how to think like the killer, he says: “What do you covet? You covet what you see everyday…”

        I don’t want to be as cynical as that, but I’ve never been a love-at-first-sight sort of person, so I don’t think you can look across the room at someone and KNOW they’re the One.

    4. Do I believe in the concept of The One?
      NO, there’s not just “One” person on the planet for me. I believe there are many “Ones” out there. But what if all 5 of my “Ones” are in China? Dude, I’d be screwed. I also don’t believe in love at first sight. Lust at first sight, infatuation at first sight, but not love.

      Would I get a TiMER if it was available?
      Nah. It would only cause anxiety. :-)

      Would I go on dates with someone I knew wasn’t going to be your soul-mate?
      Yup. I may end up with a great friend.

      Is dating’s only purpose to be a “soul-mate” tryout?
      They way most of us have been socialized, yes.

      What would I have done if I’d gotten my TiMER at 18 and saw that you had TWENTY YEARS to go before you met the love of your life? Enjoyed the ride. ;0)

    5. What I have to say is not as deep as some of the other comments, but don’t you just love the Wii streaming from Netflix!! My daughters and I have enjoyed it so much. This past summer, when we had some free time, they watched the show, “Lie to me,” that I love. If you have not watched it, start at the beginning. Great show. It is nice to have daughters old enough to be interested in some things that I like. I am way past being able to stomach anymore cartoons!!

      • I missed out on having daughters. Even though I am a tomboy at heart, I think I would have enjoyed teaching them woman things. Now I get to teach rabbits how to use the litter box… ; )
        Though, the two young women who are volunteers in the shop and I are growing close to each other. And they ask me some life things.

    6. (was How We Eat) Love is a strange beast. I mean I didn’t care for or like much my now husband when I met him. What is true for me may not be true for someone else. I am in love with him but I completely love three women and their husbands, one of which said if he were into guys I’d be, “the one”. Of course I didn’t have to bend his thumb back that far to get him to say that, but hey I’m just that way. There are many levels of loving for me. For instance I love people, men and women, who full are in possession of themselves but I’m not “in love” with them. I have very loving man, even if I have to kick him out of the kitchen every now and then.

    7. Away from your question – I LOVE MST, and used to have a bunch on VHS (don’t even have a VCR anymore)… love the old show – my fav being Pod People (Faruk Alatan? I went to school with Faruk Alatan!) and The Girl in the Gold Boots.
      Also funny, my husband was a huge Night Stalker fan, we went on a bender a couple of years ago and watched a marathon on maybe the sci-fi network.
      Love the appearance of your blog by the way!

      • Thanks LG! I got it together last week while I was home sick with a flu. I’m kinda happy with it. :)

        I think my favorite MST has to be “The Giant Gila Monster” — :)

    8. “What would you do if you’d gotten your TiMER at say, 18 and saw (like I would have) that you had TWENTY YEARS to go before you met the love of your life?”
      LOL – I did not meet mine until the ripe age of 44. I truly did not know love for a man until then. But I had my love for my son, and my varmints, to keep me happy till then. Sometimes I wish I had met Masha sooner, and we had more time. But I reckon we will live at least 40 more years, probably 50, so that’s enough for me.
      And think of all the adventure I might have missed had I settled earlier!

    9. Can a timer show more than one? Because I think … well gosh, if my marriage doesn’t work out, does that mean he wasn’t The One? And… nineteen years ago, when I first met The One, does that mean he wasn’t because we didn’t last?

      So… I think I’ve had two True Loves in my life so far, and I count myself very lucky for that. I don’t regret the intervening years, and I certainly wouldn’t get a timer on it, because I think that would screw up all the chemistry of meeting. I never wondered if my Love was The One, even though I knew I was attracted to him. However, the first time I laid eyes on him (from behind, as he studied the arrivals board at the airport) my first thought was “oh f**k” – because I just wasn’t ready for The One right then, and some inner timer knew it was happening. :D

    10. # Do you believe in the concept of The One?

      No. But I believe in “The Two”. When to people come together, they evolve as a unit.

      # Would you get a TiMER if it was available?

      NO. Like you, I believe in free will, and my own opinion. I don’t need a wristband to make decisions for me.

      # Would you go on dates with someone you knew wasn’t going to be your soul-mate?

      I wouldn’t know that. Grew up in a culture alien to “dating”.

      # Is dating’s only purpose to be a “soul-mate” tryout?
      Same as before.

      # What would you do if you’d gotten your TiMER at say, 18 and saw (like I would have) that you had TWENTY YEARS to go before you met the love of your life? That’s a lot of singlehood? How would you spend it? Would that excite you (Yay! I’m going to find my true love!) or depress you (two decades!!?!??! wahhhhh!!)

      “Yay ! I WILL find my true love.. and DOUBLE YAY, I have twenty years to achieve before I take on the responsibility”.

    11. Now that I’ve stopped laughing after reading about Pecan Pie Girl…oh, that was so funny, I may have to read the other ones…
      –No timer, and even if I had one, I’d probably ignore it and refuse to believe it worked
      –There can be more than one The One, but I think The One I’m with is pretty close if not The One (which is good enough for me)
      –What if The One, the soul mate, is actually a destructive force?
      –How does one define The One?
      Enjoyed this post quite a bit. May have to stream that movie now on PS3…

    12. I meant to comment on this when I first read it. Oops! I’m glad you enjoyed this movie as well. It does bring up a lot of questions, and I think I’d have to pass on the Timer. My relationships up until I found Dan at 25 (assuming he’d be “the one”) would have seemed a bit hollow and sad knowing how they would end.

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