STS-134: The TRUTH

As a nerd, I know a lot of people that are boo-hoo-hoo-ing and getting all misty eyed about this week’s STS-134, otherwise known as the final flight of the space shuttle Endeavour. Now, I’m not too sad to see the shuttle fleet get retired – I mean, imagine if you had to drive around in your uncle’s souped up Chevy Nova.  Pretty sweet to start, but after 30 years?  That’s a lot of miles under the hood.

Anyway, like any good story that comes to an end, NASA is saving the best for last – or nearly last.  You see, today squid have been launched into space.

I mean, that might be the coolest squid-related news since… well, that might be the coolest squid related news. Period.

Squids. In. Space.

Release the... oh, nevermind...

I know I know, the “purpose” of the “experiment” being conducted this week is to examine the effects of microgravity on the assimilation of a bacterial symbiont.  But really, don’t you have to ask the question of why one would have to test a squid’s organismal development in zero gravity?  Last time I checked squids don’t do so well outside of the ocean, right?

Well – I would think the answer is plain enough.  THE SQUID ARE MOVING ON TO THE STARS!  I mean, don’t the classic “rocketships” from the early 20th century look an awful lot like squids?!?!?  Obviously, they (and their human minions conspirators) have been paving the way for their extraterrestrial colonization for years – and now they’re enacting their tentacular plan.


My only guess is that sometime in the future – weeks, years, millennia (time may be meaningless to space-squids) – they will return.  And what will they want?  What is their ultimate squiddish plan?

Coming to a future near you

Well, do you think it’s an accident that this week’s experiment is about assimilation?!!?!?



37 thoughts on “STS-134: The TRUTH

  1. is that a real movie, I have to watch it.

    I think they are trying to turn squid into the spacecraft. The ink jets will be the propulsion system.

  2. I’m gonna go buy all the salt I can find that way I’ll be ready for them!
    Wait, salt kills slugs not squids.
    What is a squids kryptonite?

  3. This sounds like the plot to a spectacularly bad anime series. But just so the new species in charge knows, I’ve never liked that Japanese favorite, grilled squid on pizza.

    • HG — I think it sounds like a so-awesomely-bad-it’s-good sort of series… :) I have never had grilled squid on pizza, but I do like grilled squid in general — a local favorite snack is a spicy, grilled calamari taco.

  4. Ok, flying squids and space whales? I’m getting a bigger umbrella! And when I try sushi for the first time I will stay away from the squid ones!

    Lol! You guys are hilarious!

  5. **In a rare paucity of insight you ask, “What is their squiddish plan?” Come on! What kind of scientist ARE you anyway? When have you ever met a squid who, in his or her heart of hearts didn’t want to fly? No, really. Think about it. If they can fly, they can soar. If they can soar, they can achieve space, uh, flight. And if they can achieve space flight, they can…well, I’m sure you know.

    **I have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about, but since I so rarely comment herein I figured I’d give it a shot. Now I remember why I so rarely comment. Sorry dude.

  6. You know … come to think about it the things the “Martians” walked around in in “War Of The Worlds” looked an awful lot like squids! Except for the only having three legs part.

    I want it on record that I’ve never had calamari and that I used to watch “Squiddly Diddly” when I was a kid … and I liked it!

    • The WotW people probably didn’t want to tip their hand — or tentacle in this case — by giving them 3 instead of 10 appendages.

      I do remember Squiddly Diddly though!

  7. “I, for one, welcome our new cephalopod overlords.”

    Have you noticed how much Kang and Kodos resemble squids? Coincidence? I think NOT!

    And have you noticed how physicists use squids to peer into the mysteries of the universe? Coincidence? I think NOT!

    And have you noticed how squid spelled backwards is not an anagram of dog? Coincidence? I think NOT!

  8. While I was being all impressed at the blast-off, it *did* occur to me that the astronauts might see this as just another day–leading to several of less-than-optimal physical comforts.

    That brought me to thinking of them as long-distance truck drivers and then I looked at the Endeavour as the old truck she is.

    I’m still impressed as hell but that’s because I’m a hillbilly. Maybe to them, they think it’s worth at least a 3 year wait before going out on the road again.

    I believe the squids in space thing is the FSM working in mysterious ways.

  9. But don’t space whales just fall and leave a really big mess? Or was that the pot of geraniums? I can never remember…

    I have to say that I’m sorry to see the end of the shuttle era. I’m not impressed with what I’ve heard about their next generation of personnel transport.

    And no more shuttles means no more repair missions to the Hubble Space Telescope. :(

    • AB — I think the real sadness of the end of the shuttle era is that they’ve known it’s been coming for 15 years now, and they STILL don’t have the “next” option. That’s incredibly dysfunctional even by governmental standards.

  10. You’re scaring me, Steve! :( Squids and other such sea creatures are the stuff of my worst nightmares! Now to think of them falling from the skies as well… where’s a girl to run?!

  11. Pingback: Help! Help! A Giant Squid! | Stevil

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